Iran
Iranian Art, David Hockney, and LACMA
Boyd, an art lover visiting California the first time in years, reads with increasing concern a two-sided handout titled: The Future at Los Angeles County Museum of Art, and waves the news at a museum employee. “What’s this? Almost half the galleries are closed and soon the others’ll be shuttered, too.” She smiles and says,…
Read MoreOne State or Two
I knew I was going to be a hell of a president but, frankly, I underestimated myself. I’ve got a great feel for diplomacy and international relations. Did you see me at the news conference last week with Prime Minister Abe after the North Koreans had test fired another ballistic missile? I coolly let the…
Read MoreNetanyahu Assails Rouhani
All Iranian leaders are wolves. Ahmadinejad dressed like wolf so was less dangerous than new President Hassan Rouhani who’s disguised as sheep so can pull wool over international eyes. He wants you to forget decade ago he masterminded hiding nuclear weapons program. He didn’t fool Israel. No one fools us. And we pray he won’t…
Read MoreNew Iranian President
I am Hassan Rouhani, new president of Iran and most reasonable and educated man. I speak Persian, Arabic, and English well, received law degree in Scotland, and have served Iran in many high military, diplomatic, and political offices. No one has more relevant experience. I understand people and universal need for expression and think you…
Read MoreBlogger
I’m chief of Iranian Cyber-police but you don’t need name. You also don’t need names of three policemen I arrested and will detain while death of blogger Sattar Beheshti is investigated. You must, however, understand we won’t permit Iranian Revolution to be subverted by U.S.-fomented computer agitators. I guarantee Sattar Beheshti deserved to be imprisoned…
Read MoreGunter Grass’ Poem for Israel
Criticize Gunter Grass not for being anti-Semitic, which he isn’t, but for choosing the wrong medium to present “What Must Be Said” about the dangers and inequities of Israeli foreign policy. In the second stanza Grass is poetic rather than precise in stating Israel plans “a strike to snuff out the Iranian people.” The descendents…
Read MoreKim Jong-Il Attacks Again
Don’t dare celebrate Western exaggerations that my body’s withered by a stroke and my face twisted into a mask of fading comprehension. I’m still mighty Kim Jong-Il and determined to confront those who claim they’re blessed with freedom and nutrition but are in fact imperialistic criminals using economic sanctions to punish my starving North Korean…
Read MoreJewish Film Festival in the Bay Area
Baghdad Twist Don’t ask my age. It’s none of your business, I told my son, and doesn’t concern people who’ll watch your documentary. No one’s going to see me in this film. They’ll only hear my voice. Better they look at black and white photos of me as a child in reasonably hospitable Iraq where…
Read MoreShah of Iran Comments on the Nuclear Nation
Why would I be bitter the Americans deserted me? I suppose they felt I hadn’t done enough. During World War II, after the British forced my anachronistic father to leave the throne and installed me, I opened a vital Persian Corridor for Anglo-American supplies Russia used to defeat the Nazis. In the 1950’s I again…
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