Archive for 2010
Raccoon Attacks Child and Father
As the paramount raccoon I am hosting this press conference to explain and apologize rather than justify. I understand we raccoons stand rather low in the eyes of you humans who consider us stealthy and untrustworthy creatures because we wear bandit black masks across our eyes. Our physical stature is also uninspiring as we usually…
Read MoreBasketball in Downtown Los Angeles
Trust yourself. You’ve been to the Staples Center in downtown Los Angeles many times, so you know you’re walking the right way, south on Figueroa Street a couple of blocks to the arena. Okay, then. Where is it? It’s got to be there. They haven’t moved a building holding almost twenty thousand people, have they?…
Read MoreDevil Rebukes Pat Robertson for Remarks about Haiti
I’m weary of people blaming me for calamities both natural and premeditated. Recently, religious charlatan Pat Robertson attributed the disastrous earthquake in Haiti – as well as its tragic history of slavery, colonialism, bloodthirsty leaders, crime, poverty, hurricanes, floods, and other disasters – to a “pact with the devil” by leaders of the 1791 slave…
Read MoreHaiti Mauled Again
This story appears in the collection “In Other Hands”
Read MoreThe Atomic Cafe
Welcome to The Atomic Café where we serve vivid images of tests from July 1945 Alamogordo leading to uncontested flight over Hiroshima about which crewman notes hard to conceive damage they’ve done. Smiling President Truman reports we’ve taken biggest scientific gamble in history, awful responsibility, and won, and thank God it’s our responsibility and not…
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