Archive for 2012
Winton, Not Winston, in Quito
A travel newsletter I subscribed to occasionally offered stories by a guy named Winton Churchill. Oh, a wise guy, I concluded. Despite groaning about his humor, and perhaps his stability, I did conclude Churchill knew plenty about computers. He’d worked for Apple, knew Steve Jobs, toiled for other Silicon Valley concerns, some of which flamed…
Read MoreBag in Stall
In a crowded holiday airport he long waited for a stall and was thanking god when, fast as he blinked, a hand reached under the door and yanked his bag.
Read MoreThe Usain Bolt Gear
Tyson Gay has beaten me in a hundred-meter dash, so has Asafa Powell, and Yohan Blake recently outran me in both the hundred and two hundred at our Olympic trials in Jamaica. Those three are the swiftest in history, after me, and may be thinking, or at least hoping, that while I used to be…
Read MoreMiddle of River
Don’t go in the American River, kids in our neighborhood were often told. There are branches, rocks, and an undertow you can’t see. Here, read today’s newspaper; another boy’s drowned. We still couldn’t stay out and swam whenever we wanted, never meeting danger until mature enough to drink Friday night. The cops yelled, hey you…
Read MoreThe Tumble
An old woman carefully descended steps of a museum amphitheater, stopped at the second row from the front, and said, “Excuse me.” I immediately rose, and she planted about half her foot on the step, a semi-high heel hanging over, spun ninety degrees and fell, her hips landing on the first step and then her…
Read MoreSecurity Dreams
Night before first day as security guard John seldom stopped twisting and wife retreated to sofa. After work he happily returned home and reported job wasn’t stressful as anticipated. Few weeks later he began to occasionally snooze at post. Following month someone used cell phone to immortalize peaceful John on Facebook. In morning boss fired.…
Read MoreSavings
Pushing hand between armrest and cushion of ragged sofa, I searched for unknown artifacts and pulled out faded savings pass book revealing thirty years ago had opened account with hundred dollars, inauspicious total for man in twenties. Two weeks later I needed ninety dollars. That happens when make few hundred monthly. I still rebuilt balance…
Read MoreOur Final Days
Early on a Saturday morning in late June my stepfather, age eighty-seven and already weakening, suffered a stroke that rendered him unconscious. Inside a large hospital emergency room the only doctor on duty was too busy to look closely, so a few nurses and technicians strongly sedated him, stuck a tube down his throat and…
Read MoreExecutive Confusion
New executives understand little about business yet often rudely give nonsensical orders to experienced professionals. Pros are quite upset but executives proclaim way of future. They never actually learned any way but no matter since all have special degree authorizing to transform ignorance into arrogance. Expect more problems until system changes. It will change when…
Read MoreCrime Scene
going to drive by house down street want to come what house said wife where those three people were shot last night that’s disgusting
Read MorePresident Chapo Guzman
Come on. Admit it. You keep having to Google “new Mexican president” because you can’t remember Enrique Pena Nieto. He’s handsome but like generic model and smooth but so’s oily auto part. You know he represents old guard PRI that ruled dictatorially for decades, spoon feeding wealthy while ignoring poor. Trust me, Enrique Pena Nieto…
Read MoreLion Family
author of “the serengeti lion” doesn’t understand father ripping cubs to death or mother eating their guts Source: “Wild Things” by David Samuels in Harper’s June 2012.
Read MoreUgandan Birth Control
ugandan mother of seven declines birth control so husband won’t beat again
Read MoreKit Foxes in the Road
Four years little kit foxes, bearing the sharp angular look of underfed and downtrodden foxes, instantly scattered from the road as I reentered my neighborhood, interrupting asphalt gatherings that had followed their nocturnal dashes from dens to seek duck eggs, lizards, and insects. A few months ago the kit foxes began departing leisurely and, instead…
Read MoreGay Moscow
moscow bans gay parades hundred years when president putin will lead procession
Read MoreThe Human Brain
This story is in the collection “Basketball and Football”
Read MoreBakersfield at the Movies
Legions of teenagers and adults march into theater carrying troughs of buttered popcorn and sodas large enough for elephants, and guffaw during previews of teddy bear wrestling man, creamed pants jokes, president slicing face open to reveal he’s bullet-dodging, axe-wielding “Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter.” Amid chomping and slurping, I wonder how many here have watched…
Read MoreWorld According to Americans
Don’t know if they were godless communists or radical Muslims but some outrageous critters emailed world map insulting Americans. On map they write we think Canada’s uninhabited. Bull feathers. We know few icy people live up there, and they sure as hell want to be like Alaska next door, which is now America except for…
Read MoreConviction of Bashar al-Assad
i keep saying terrorists incited and abetted by foreigners are attacking our beloved syrian homeland and have convinced myself and hope you as well
Read MoreBaby Frogs
At school the lawn banks toward a shady northern wall by a sprinkler oozing puddles where every spring male frogs mount female backs and fertilize eggs as they’re laid in water. We never notice the tadpoles that first emerge but are delighted by the sudden appearance of hundreds of baby frogs. Initially they’re fingertip-size and…
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